Click ‘Refresh’

                        One day while sitting in a restaurant I saw one lady nearby using a Nokia 3310. Immediately my memories rushed back to my college days when I first started using a mobile phone – a borrowed 3310. The feel, the ease of using the keypad, the single buzz sound (for messaging while in class!), the tough look etc started flashing in my mind. Feeling nostalgic I went and bought an old Nokia 3310 (against the warnings of all my friends). It’s been 6 years since I used my favourite 3310 and I rushed back home to run my old buddy once again. I guess this phone might have been produced way back in 2000 and it showed all signs of old age. It blinked and coughed 2-3 times and then it died! Yes, that’s it. I was not able to use it even for an hour! As an MBA student I had done the worst investment in my life, but it taught me a great lesson – never try to relive your present with nostalgic feelings!

Some of us do the same mistake in our relationship with Jesus. We come into renewal or into the Jesus Youth movement through a powerful God experience. It may have occurred either while praying in a retreat/prayer meeting or while dealing a difficult situation in our life. We usually tend to associate this encounter with the personal image of our Lord Jesus Christ. Whenever we are able to experience the same feeling we are happy and whenever we are not; we feel out of touch with God. Though normal and to an extent healthy (in the initial days of our growing relationship with Jesus); this “always seeking first encounter” attitude will prevent us from getting closer to him. Scripture says “The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases, his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning;” (Lamentations 3: 22-23).

Translated it means a new encounter every day. We get to know a new facet of the omnipotent and omnipresent Lord each new day. If we search for the same feeling every day we are limiting God. We are obstructing his amazing grace which flows to us in thousand different ways. It can be through the cool winter breeze (that refreshing feel?) or through the dry breeze (when we thirst for HIM?) or through that email from an old friend (when we feel wanted?) or through the unexpected smile of a stranger (got a new friend?) or after many failed attempts we finally stayed awake through that boring lecture (loving that boring professor or that tough subject?) or when we start praising lord in our sickness (THY will over our will?) or thanking Jesus for that tough situation (started kissing your cross?). This list is endless for you and me. Let’s start adding a new one every new day. 

P.S: Just now I experienced Jesus through the typed word - a reason good enough to keep me blogging :)

Some 'Fishy' Thoughts

                                      After nearly 15 years I decided to rekindle my old passion or hobby of having fish at home. Since an old tank was already available at house we only need to buy the fish and filter for it. We bought 2 big ones and 4 small ones. With great joy we cleaned up the old tank and installed everything in an hour’s time. We couldn’t control the excitement; we smiled n squealed like small school children :). My roommate - an avid lover of fish, also quoted a scientific study that states that watching fish will reduce our blood pressure – little did we know that our BP is going to increase in the coming days!

After one day we noticed that the big red fish is hitting and biting its pair. The bitten fish started hiding and whenever it tries to come out it will be chased back. Cutting the story short it died of bleeding and starvation in 2 days. It was a shock to know that such enmity and hatred exists even among fish! After few days, our close friend gave us his fish tank to look after when he goes out of town. It had beautiful golden fish gliding around silently and peacefully. Watching it was a serene experience. We tried to shift the small fish from our tank to avoid the “killer” fish. But the small ones also started the same biting behavior with the big silent golden fish forcing us to put it back. In short our tank became a place of wailing and gnashing of teeth (literally) and the friend’s tank became a place of joy and happiness. To finish it off yesterday we found that one of the small fish also killed its pair!

Whatever be the scientific or logical reasoning behind the behavior of our killer fish, it made me think about our homes. Aren’t some of us like that killer fish? Due to our stubbornness and hard heartedness didn’t we change our peaceful homes into hell? Didn’t we also transfer our hatred into other members of our family or maybe to our roommates in our hostel? We may appear very flashy and appealing to the people outside (we are supposed to be role models too!) but what happens in our personal life and our family will be quite the opposite. My mom used to tell me (usually after a quarrel) - “Let me see your coordinator; I will reveal your real face to JY!” I use to laugh at her but will feel guilty afterwards.  I used to be an altar boy from childhood and a Jesus Youth from college days – a model catholic boy for all, but not at home. I used to be lazy, stubborn and quarrelsome at home. By the grace of God over the years I have realized my mistake and I am trying to change since then. Jesus says "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God” [Mathew 5:9]. Is there a desire in me to become son/daughter of God? Are we really peacemakers at our home; at our workplace; at our parish or our colleges? To whom do we associate - the silent Gold fish which easily mingles with other fishes and create a serene atmosphere or the killer fish which creates lot of trouble and unhappiness in the life of others? 

P.S: Post our traumatic experience we are planning to donate the killer (sorry Red Parrot) fish; any takers? :)